Mother’s Day just passed several weeks ago, the customary roses, flowers, gift cards to Ross, as always, you accepted them graciously and thankfully. I see and feel your warm smile and I realized a simple “Happy Mother Day” card would have been just as sufficient as anything extravagant.
Today, no different than any other day, I drove you home from work; the bags of dirty towels that needed to be in the laundry seemed smaller and smaller each day. I know the slow economy and California State furlough is affecting your business. Maybe it’s a blessing; for once you’re able to take a break. The forty minute drive from the shop back home usually allowed enough time for your power nap as you wind down your day. I often look over to your side, hear your deep breath, I wonder sometimes if you even have time or energy to dream or let your mind wander to a different world- a world so different than that of today’s.
I wonder if thousands of other mothers knew that they shared a common denominator, not only as a refugee but also whose lives are forever intertwined as they all shared a similar fate and destiny. By virtual of coming to a new land, a new world glossed on the surface as a land of opportunity, anyone can be business owners, but deep down, at the very core, it was more about the economic survival. The very career that helped pay for our education and make ends meet is causing your health and physical deterioration-years of sanding acrylic finger nails and inhaling the toxic powder and chemicals. I see you aged and your deformed fingers caused by decades of sanding, brushing and wonder when will your children be able to pay back what you have given us.
The long schedule; 6 days week, 10 hours day, and yet you still manage a smile. The teasing and mistreatment you occasionally experienced at work; dealing with the public to whom you are so grateful for helping to put foods on the table and have means and resources for a better life. But on a few occasions, they too can be the source of sadness and annoyance. And you managed to connect with them despite the differences, the language barriers and culture gaps. You managed your salon shop and serviced all your clients even those who were not too accepting of your accent or appreciate physical appearance or your lack of cultural assimilation. Even when they laughed and turned your work and profession into a comedic act- they didn’t just make fun of your line of work they critiqued our culture, they teased about your accent and even had thousands of viewers on YouTube join in to make you and all other Nail salon moms the laughing stock and the butt of their joke – you and all our mothers continued on and made dues of it all.
I wonder if all the mothers that worked at beauty salons on Stockton Boulevard realized how much their encouraging words and unwavering support meant to me and our team. They excitedly posted our January 17th and February 2nd event posters to inform our community of Little Saigon Designation Vote at the City Council and Board of Supervisors. I wonder if they know their hard work and sacrifices that they’ve made for their children have not gone unnoticed. It was their sacrifice and support that brought together the 8 of us to take on this project. It was their presence in the halls at the city council, for many it was their first time, which made us feel validated and affirmed, what we’ve embarked on was something historic and a worthwhile cause.
Hundreds of our supporters came out on February 2, 2010 event as we heard a unanimous 9-0 vote for the approval of the Little Saigon of Sacramento Designation, the cheering and jubilant excitement consumed the entire room of over 300 community members and the remaining 180 who watched through a video feed from upstairs. It was a testament, tribute, and a validation of all their hard work. That night was a celebration of the entire community but for many of our moms it was a moment in time that cemented their sense of self-worth, their contributions and affirmation to their role not just as mothers and but also contributing members of society that demanded their voices to be heard. It was their first time, in many senses, getting involved in political activism. Along with our uncles and aunts, our moms provided transportation for the elderly to get to City Hall, they make personal phone calls to their friends and clients seeking support as well getting signatures for our petition to have the designation approve.
To others and to the mainstream society, they see you as their nails lady, their barber, their worker. To us, you are a shining example of strong Vietnamese mothers, who despite all obstacles and difficulties, you have persevered. Maybe it was too late you and for our moms to use your collective voice to form associations and PACs to bring about positive change in your workplace and affect governmental policies that are intended to keep you safe and protected. But to you, it’s just the beginning for your children and your community to come together; be reminded of our humble beginnings and push forward the spirit and purpose of our connected destinies – to live free and to pursue happiness.
So often I get caught up with my privileged life, able to read, write, speak fluent English, I carry the title American proudly and expressively, and afforded an education and a lifestyle that you never had.
I know you have hopes and dreams for yourself; you were once a child and a student walking home from school, proud of your achievements and grades, dreaming that one day in the future to become nurses, teachers and doctors.
When the tanks rolled into Saigon and your boat landed in America, to many it was their dream come true. To you it was a reality that you had no control over; a family to feed and support, no time for school and training, little means and resources to leverage. A stranger in a strange land but a survivor through perilous sea, confronted storms and pirates, political upheavals and discrimination, you pressed on living day by day, hoping one day your legacy will be remembered.
It’s been two years since our Little Saigon Designation was approved. I don’t get to see you as often as my work becomes consuming and life’s responsibilities and possibilities have increased 10 folds ever since our community project. Each time we drive down freeway 99 from your beauty salon in downtown to Elk Grove passing Fruitridge Road exit, seeing the “Little Saigon” freeway sign, I can only imagine the pride and satisfaction you and other mothers can take, knowing that you all have as much stake and responsibility to its creation as your children and your community. And more so now than ever, as thousands of commuters driving up and down freeway 99 can bear witness to your influence and contribution to our collective American Dream- not only aspiring to become a productive and contributing member of this great country, but also reinforcing the idea that hard-work, perseverance and determination can and will turn every dream and hope into reality. As real as the smile I have driving you home each time.